Wednesday, March 09, 2005

What's in a song?

As predicted, all the people that I work with suck. Except Lisa...she brought me coffee.

I think today is going to be ass slow, so I will make sure I add another Employee Profile, which I haven't down in quite some time. I think this blog has morphed into me just bitching about things in general while showcasing my incredibly intelligent wit. No one cares except for me and that's just fucking fine.

In the mean time...The Idol was semi-disappointing last night. There were so many ups and downs and so much eye rolling by yours truly that I most likely incurred some brain damage. Was it worth it?? YES. Of course. Big Duh.

Please note: I have made some enhancements in this entry that I'm proud of such as hyperlinks...and more hyperlinks. This is a big deal for me so...click on all of them.

Tuesday, March 8 (also happens to be Allie's birthday): The Ladies are up. Whoever gets through during tonight's results show will be in the top 12 with the 6 top guys. Oh the anticipation of it all!!

First up was Amanda
I don't like her. I don't like her big mouth and crinkled smile or horse teeth. I'm not saying she doesn't have a hot bod, because she does BUT she repulses me otherwise. I'm still wretching at the thought of Simon hitting on her on national live television. Ew! Anyway...during her performance, she kept beating on the microphone with her hand and it was totally audible. Real smooth Amanda. And I didn't like her corset. Did we go back in time two hundred years and I missed it? No, that's what I thought. Just checking.

Between performances, Seacrest was in the "red room" (please) with Nadia. I like Nadia, I really do. So I was pretty shocked when she told Seacrest that "God has my back." What?!?! Is he going to step to you, Snoop Dogg? Ugh. Enough. And speaking of God, almost every single contestant in the final 24 says they will thank "God" or "Jesus" if they win. What has God done? Do you have proof? Did he come to your house and play the piano and teach you how to sing? Just...no.

Next up: Janay
Or as I like to call her "Krusty Bang." Last night, she wasn't necessarily rocking the crusty bang, and she actually looked pretty cute BUT she sucked sooooooooooo bad. I'm no expert by any means but even I could tell that there was not one correct note in her performance. It was hideous. She should have been kicked off last week. Horrid!!

Next: Carrie
Oh Carrie, you are cuter than cute and I really really like you. You're so wholesome and pure...and from Oklahoma!! But what are you wearing? Are those pasties on the outside of your shirt? Isn't your mom watching? Put on a sweater! You did alright...with the singing or whatever.

Then we have the fashion victim of the evening...
Vonzell
She usually looks super cute. There are photos to prove it. I'm not sure I care that her Dad came to visit and brought her matching boots and hat, laiden with rhinestones. They should never have left her hotel room. I was completely distracted by the swinging tassles. I think she did alright.

At this point in the show, that Burger King commercial with that dude from Hootie and the Blowfish and the girls in hotpants and midgets doing flips came on. What IS this? Are they serious? What marketing genius came up with this shit?

Ok, back to the show...
Nadia
Even after she made that ridiculous comment about God, I still like her. Despite her strange outfit and the weird way she bits her bottom lip when she smiles, she rocked it out and sang one of my favorite songs. I'm really torn here...I hate her but I love her. It's...hard.

Lindsay
She was wearing coolatts (aren't your ankles cold?) and sang Aerosmith (apparently it's 1996). Simon made an awesome comment about her being the "pop star equivalent" of Seacrest and then Seacrest threw water at him. At this point, I realized that these two should just do each other in the butt and get it over with. The sexual tension is killing me!

Mikala
I'm getting tired.

Jessica
She has boobs!
I voted for her and only because she offended me the least of all the ladies tonight.

I lost my steam...

2 comments:

Melissa said...

Okay, a few comments/additions to your assessment:

Nadia - I like that her skirt and her hair had the same bounce-ability. That's points in my book.

Mikelah - Her mouth was doing so wierd contortions and she needed to step away from the teasing comb because that ponytail, bumpy head thing bothered me.

Jessica - The combo of green velvet boob-top and bad dye job leave me with three words: Trailer Trash Idol. But I still love her.

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