Moving on

So Christmas Eve was not at all a good scene. I had a few glasses of wine and blubbered all night about how much of a mess my life is. You'd think I could hold it together. I could have cried at the drop of a hat. And then everyone reassured me my life wasn't a mess, I would not die alone and I was very successful etc. etc. They all told me how much they loved me, which was so nice to hear. Alas...no one could produce a loving significant other...no, not even a blue one.

Then my mother (my real mother) showed up. It wasn't so much upsetting as jarring. I was caught extremely off guard...not the kind of surprise I like. She was actually fine...it was her husband who was a real dick. Fuck him. And he was drunk, of course. It takes one to know one.

Transition to today, a much more normal and calm family gathering where I had an epiphany. If I can't afford to buy something right now, I need to rent a place and live by myself. I can't deal with roommates anymore. It's not anything in particular, I just feel like I'm suffocating. And as much as I love southie, I need somewhere to put my car. I pay too much for it to wonder if I'll ever see it in the same condition I left it. I think my sanity is worth more than anything else (including the down payment on a condo), at least for right now.

Obviously waiting until the winter ends to actually move is a good idea. I did a quick look and it appears that Malden/Medford are the places to be that I can afford and still save just a little bit. Wahoo. That also gives me more time to squirrel away money and something to look forward to. Perfect and more perfect.

New project! I needed this.