I went to a wedding, got SO hammered (last time was around June) and DID NOT sleep with anyone!
Instead, I made out with two different people.
Now...I know what you are thinking.
"Stephanie?!!?! You ignorant slut! I thought you turned over a new leaf!?!??"
And my reply:
"I know. It doesn't sound great. And I'm embarrassed with my behavior, since I'm not 19 anymore and I shouldn't be making out with people in bathrooms like I'm a horny co-ed at a frat party (those were the days, weren't they??). BUT it's progress. I'm a passionate, sexual woman with needs, and trust me, it could have been much MUCH worse."
Hooray! I am determined to celebrate the victories, no matter how inconsequential.
The not so good news: The following day (Saturday) I reached a new low point and I threw up in a Wal-Mart bathroom. On a very busy Saturday morning.
Other not so good news: I still have yet to meet my man. 13 days and counting until the official end of the summer. Time is running out. Don't be surprised if I run away to a nunnery or leper colony. They might be the only two groups of people accepting of me after the mockery I made out of myself at a stranger's wedding...in New Hampshire...and yes, I fell on my ass a few times. I have the bruises and grass stains to prove it.
But get this! I kept my 3 inch heals on the whole time. I actually blame them exclusively for my fall. I'm sure my high level of intoxication has nothing at all to do with it. Nah.