Monday, November 21, 2005

Black Wednesday

So my birthday is on Wednesday. 25 years young.

I've never been a fan of the day. I guess I'm really not into celebrating my own birth, especially since one of my parents (who was like, there) isn't in the picture. And the other parent (and other other parent...god, I'm making this complicated) doesn't get all that excited about it, either.

I don't remember anyone ever being excited about it. I see my sister with her kids, getting them all riled up for the big 10 or the big 5 and I actually get jealous. (I'm not proud of being jealous of a 5 year old.) I don't think I ever got that pure, selfless feeling of wanting to have a day just about ME. Or maybe I did and I don't remember. It's entirely possible. I know I was a big brat when I was little...or so I'm told.

At any rate, I dread it every year. I don't want anyone to make a big deal and I just want it to get shoved under the rug, along with that extra five pounds and the book that I can't seem to finish reading.

But before you get all "aww, that's so sad, she just needs a nice day" and shit, remember this: I say I don't want anyone to make a big deal out of it, but I actually do.

I want everyone to make a HUGE deal to make up for the non-deal it was when I was little. I want surprises and declarations of love and voices from the past and a million dollars. I want a new car and a new computer and a house and a 4 carat diamond ring and a job that I really, truly love and to lose 20 pounds and to fit into a size 10 and to have smaller feet.

This is your life...

....and 5 more years until you can REALLY be depressed about your age.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well, well That says it all. Except for what I want to say. I hope you have the best Birthday ever. I hope all your wishes come true. Being 25 is HUGE. After all it is a quarter of a century or less than a quarter of your life. It only happens once, so make the best of it. I'll be sending my best your way. I love you lots. CJ